When we were young, we sought approval from our parents. As we grew older, we tried to impress our teacher, show off to our girlfriend or boyfriend, and suck up to our boss. Maybe it’s time to impress the most important person in life . . . Yourself. Unfortunately, some people can’t say that they’re proud of what they do.
If you don’t put your heart into your activities, if you hand in incomplete work as finished, if you don’t do your best every time you start something, then you’re doing yourself a tremendous disservice. The truth is, if you’re not proud of what you do, you’re not done. This doesn’t mean that you have to win the race, secure every promotion, or be named Parent of the Year, but at least you’ll know, in your heart, that you’ve done your best.
What Makes People Proud?
There are many things that make us proud — getting a promotion, making a difference in someone’s life, buying a dream house, being recognized as the best in a particular line of work, knowing that you’re raising your kids to be well-adjusted human beings, being viewed as a wonderful role model, or overcoming a serious challenge in life — to name just a few. These accomplishments are especially meaningful when they’re the result of hard work, perseverance, and knowing that you’ve done your best.
But not everyone gets it. They sabotage their ability to be proud of what they do. The reasons are numerous:
Some folks have talent, but they simply don’t apply themselves. • Others are so afraid of failing that they don’t try at all — and consequently, they fail. • Some people give up at the first sight of an obstacle. • When brainstorming ideas, some individuals settle on the first answer — which isn’t always the best one. • Others are more interested in checking items off a to-do list, and moving on, rather than doing their best work. • There are those who hand in unfinished work, and expect the recipient to review it for them — errors and all. • Still others can’t take credit for their achievements because they’ve cheated. • Some people multitask or have so much on their plates that they can’t give anything the attention that it deserves. • Of course, if you receive handouts and didn’t earn the rewards you enjoy, then it’s tough to be proud of your effort. • Some people measure success by being busy rather than getting the job done properly. Sure, they get a lot of stuff done — poorly.
You owe it to yourself to do your best in life. Don’t wait to apply this principle to BIG things. It also applies to simple tasks such as writing a letter to a friend, working out at the gym, or spending quality time with your family. It doesn’t mean that you’ll always be successful. You won’t. But at least you can take pride in knowing that you gave it your all. Plus, when you embrace this way of thinking, you’ll end up raising your game by continually trying to better your best.
A To-do List to Make Yourself Proud:
Follow your passion. If you love what you do, you’ll never view your job as work. You’ll be excited to wake up each morning and give everything your best.
The only thing we have to fear. You won’t regret failing, but you may regret not having tried.
Compete with yourself. Forget about competing with others. It only breeds animosity. Instead, compete with yourself and find ways to improve your game every day.
Know your capabilities. Just because you’re an expert in one area doesn’t make you an expert in everything. Don’t let your ego influence you to claim an expertise completely outside your areas of knowledge.
Focus is key. Know your limits. Don’t spread yourself too thin by biting off more than you can chew.
Be prepared to leave your comfort zone. Set stretch goals that motivate you to challenge your best efforts. As Les Brown said, “Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you’ll land among the stars.”
Learn from the best. Identify role models from whom you can learn. Ask for feedback on ways to raise your game.
Practice, practice, practice. Excellence comes from practice.
Give yourself a report card. Learn from the past. After every activity, ask yourself, “How can I make it better next time?”
Yes, you can. Don’t quit. As Thomas Edison said, “Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.”
Don’t let success go to your head. Celebrate success, but don’t let it change you as a person. One of the most difficult challenges is to remain grounded after achieving success. Humility is a sign of strength, not weakness. People with humility are modest about their achievements, grounded in their values, and quietly proud.
Define happiness for yourself. Any article about doing your best and being proud of what you do wouldn’t be complete without a discussion about living with a purpose. Success in life begins and ends with purpose.
Do Yourself Proud
Why do anything half-hearted if you have the ability to do it well? If you don’t do your best, you’re only developing bad habits, damaging your reputation, and letting your team down. Plus, you’re robbing yourself of the rewards that you truly deserve.
You have what it takes to be a star, but it’ll still take hard work to become a success. That means setting high goals, following ethical standards, focusing attention on your priorities, and sticking with it until you can be proud of your effort. So, always give everything 110 percent. It’s the extra 10 percent that everyone remembers. As Abraham Lincoln said, “Whatever you are, be a good one.” And remember, if you’re not proud, you’re not done.
What Do You Think?
Additional Reading:
The Power of a Positive Attitude
Earning Success the Old-fashioned Way
Personal Responsibility: The Buck Stops with You
Courage: No Guts, No Glory
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I don’t call it or have ever felt its sucking up to my boss. I respect my boss and have always had good bosses.
I try to do well so they look well since they are nice to me. Have worked 45 years and only have had 4 bosses in my adult time.
Hi Eusebio
You’re very lucky that you’ve had four terrific bosses during your career. Managers don’t always realize the impact that they have on people who work for them. It’s clear that they had a very positive influence on you. I applaud them for their management style, and for you in showing your loyalty and respect.
Best,
Frank
This post is interesting for me and it conjures up many emotions for me.
If I think about myself I am proud of what I have accomplished thus far but to say I am done or not? That is difficult to say.
It reminds me of a workshop I once gave and we were talking about purpose and meaning of life and this man got up and started to share his story and he was crying and saying, he felt like a failure, that he had no purpose and everyone in the workshop was empathetic and sympathetic and saying you will accomplish great things and he should not worry.
And I took a different stand I told him. our purpose our passion our mission – can be something that comes easy to us, or we can even find enjoyable and it can be little things that mean a lot –
If you had children and they were out in the world making a difference you could be proud of that….
if you had a loving relationship with your wife- you could be proud of that
If you smiled at someone
If you hugged someone
If you said the right words to someone
Little things to us BUT BIG things to others.
We do not know what our purpose is and we do not know how much we need to accomplish in this lifetime.
Maybe its small – maybe its big but we must BE proud of EVERYTHING we do. Because at every moment we could be done.
If you are not proud – I don’t think its not because you are not done…maybe you are not looking realistically at yourself?
Hi Lolly
You raise a very important point. You distinguish between being proud of an activity versus being proud in life.
I believe people should do their best every time they perform an activity. Then, they can take great pride even if they come in last place in a race. The same can not be said for the student who gets a “C” on a test if they were fully capable of getting an “B” –– but didn’t try.
With regard to being proud in life, I believe pride is a journey not a destination.
Thanks again for your thoughts. Have an awesome day.
Best,
Frank
And pat yourself on the back! If you wait for approval and recognition from others, it may never come. So congratulate yourself! You know you have done well! Thanks for a great article.
Hi Amy —
You’re absolutely right. There’s nothing wrong with giving yourself a pat on the back after all of your hard work pays off. That being said. . . . In my opinion, it’s important to be quietly proud.
Have an awesome day!
Best,
Frank
This is a post well-worth revisiting for me.
For a while I would think of pride in a negative light because often being too proud or proud for the wrong reasons wasn’t an admirable trait. I absolutely love the phrase “If you’re not proud, you’re not done” and the explanation thereof. It reminds me of the adage ‘anything worth doing is worth doing right’ and recalls many times not understanding when someone I worked with or for would end a meeting or project mumbling about ‘good enough for now’ – yet there was never a ‘later’ that resolved the real issue.
Like Lolly, this conjures up many different emotions for me – mostly because I was coached never to be too proud, or let my pride get the best of me. But Frank’s point is different and the take-away is timeless – a sense of subtle pride is good and we’re doing a disservice to ourselves and others if we’re continuously ok doing half-ass jobs. This sets a bad example, creates a habit that’s often hard to break and comes back to diminish our character. Great comments, too everyone.
Hi Marc
You’re absolutely right. “being too proud or proud for the wrong reasons isn’t an admirable trait.” In fact, I discussed this issue with my good friend Ed Berryman before the post went live. He made a similar comment.
As you noted, the message of this post is a bit different “Anything worth doing is worth doing right. ” I hope that this week’s post, “Be humble: Don’t Let Success Go to Your Head” reinforces the point that your making even further.
Thanks so much for your thoughts Marc. And, for advancing the conversation.
Have an awesome day!
Best,
Frank
I just read your latest post, but it triggered a thought I deemed more appropriate to tie to this post:
“When you become successful, don’t rest on your laurels. As soon as you take your eye off the ball, you risk losing your edge.”
This reminds me of a time in my life where – for a fun exercise – I tried to create references from my professional experience that also applied to distance running. One of my favorite unpolished nuggets being:
“An object or obstacle stays in front of you until you take action to surpass it. Even then it is not enough to pass it – you must continuously move faster than it or it will overtake you yet again.”
It’s often easy to breeze past someone when you’re running down a hill – but if you don’t plan for the next uphill and keep up your pace, you’re going to be right back where you started, behind. Short-term successes are a dime a dozen – like one-hit wonders. Stustained success sets apart the perennial winners from the ‘also-rans’. You can live your life content as the Flock of Seagulls or aspire to be the Rolling Stones…it’s up to you. But be proud when you’re done!
Hi Marc
Great analogy. I’m sure all the runners who read this blog can identify with your thought.
Also, I want you to know that you made my day. The purpose of this blog is to encourage people to think about and discuss the importance of personal values. The fact that you came back to share an additional idea makes me happier than you’ll ever know. Thank you Marc!
Best,
Frank
Great post, Frank.
I use to struggle with the dichotomy of being proud versus being grounded and humble. You make a good point – that we should take pride in the sincerity of our efforts, not the outcomes.
With your permission, I’m going to paraphrase this post to share with my pre-teen son: these life skills have to be learnt early!
Thanks!
Hi Srikanth
The highest compliment you can pay an author is asking to share the author’s work with your kids. Every once in a while I ask myself why I write. You gave me with the answer. Thank you!
Have a great day!
Frank
This report has help it made me feel proud of myself and I made a to do list! Thank you very much! I also love the other reports you write they help my a lot! Thank you!!!!
Hi Tara
I’m glad you find the post useful and are taking the lessons to heart. Thanks for taking the time to write.
Best,
Frank
Just found this article, and recently realized that I’m not proud of my work. I finished my first novel and went through about five different revisions with it. I put it out there on Amazon. In the process of going to promote it, I realize that I’m not at all proud of it, and I’m not sure exactly why. I’ve told none of my friends or family about it. They knew I was writing it, but they don’t know that it’s “out there”. Just today, a friend asked me if I’d recommend a book for her to read. And I did, but it wasn’t my book. It’s not that I’m shy, but I’m kind of embarrassed to have anyone I know read it. I don’t think it’s horrible, but I don’t think it’s good either. So, I know what you mean. It probably needs another revision.
Hi S.P. Shane
This is a tough call. Sometimes we’re harder on ourselves than need be — especially when it comes to the written word. If you once found meaning in your words, surely someone else will as well. It’s important to identify why you’re not proud of your book. Maybe there’s another one in your future.
Best,
Frank
How do you feel pride if you are a person with no drive in life or competition but who still does consistently much better than others, and no passion because of a genetic trait limiting emotions and feelings in your family?
Hi Nicholas
I believe how you compare to others is less important than whether you’re striving to become better and to do better. As I say, “When you compete with yourself, you both win.”
Thanks for taking the time to write.
Best,
Frank