Some folks are obsessed with how they’re viewed, whether they’ll be accepted, and how they compare with others. The truth is that most of those things shouldn’t matter at all. Life is short. Why spend it on stupid stuff? What really counts is whether you have a strong sense of self-worth and live a meaningful life. Navigating that pathway isn’t always easy. Then again, if you set high standards, make good choices, do right by people, and live with honor and integrity, most things fall into place.
Just think…You won’t have to keep up with the Joneses, put on a show for others, or fear what people say behind your back. Instead, you can focus on being a good person, striving to grow each day, and following your North Star — in other words, listening to your conscience.
Why Waste Your Time on Stupid Stuff?
How often do you worry about how you look, what others think, whether you’ll be accepted, or how you compare? The problem with that line of reasoning is that:
It’s impossible to please everyone. As Dr. Seuss said, “Be who you are and say what you feel because people who mind don’t matter and people who matter don’t mind.”
Trying too hard to accommodate others will never satisfy your own needs. It’s so easy to get hijacked by other people’s priorities. While it’s nice to be needed, know what matters most to you and be unwilling to compromise those priorities at almost any price.
People don’t always know better. Consider the advice of others but trust yourself in the end. It’s your life. Own it!
Comparing yourself to others is self-destructive. According to Zen Shin, “A flower does not think of competing with the flower next to it. It just blooms.” If you appreciate what you have, you’ll never want for more.
Most things you worry about never come to pass. According to a recent study, over 91% of things that people worry about don’t come true. So don’t believe everything that you think.
Success doesn’t always lead to happiness. We place artificial demands on ourselves that undermine our happiness. These demands force us to work harder and harder to cross a finish line that keeps moving.
Focusing on stupid stuff is unproductive. Whenever you spend time on a trivial matter, you miss an opportunity to focus on something that’s important.
Priorities First
Some folks are so fixated on stupid stuff that they lose sight of things that count, such as becoming a better person, building trusting relationships, creating lasting memories, and making a difference.
Do you:
- Pursue what you want or what’s expected of you?
- Think for yourself or surrender to public opinion?
- Confront your fears or back away from them?
- Do yourself proud, or seek acceptance and approval from others?
- Live in the present or dwell in the past?
- Collect precious moments or accumulate lots of things?
- Own your life or are you overly dependent on others?
- Do what’s right or choose what’s easy?
Many of us take each day as it comes and seem surprised where life has taken us. If you don’t make things that matter a priority, you’re bound to spend time on things that don’t. The result will be caring more about how you’re perceived than building a strong sense of self-worth, keeping up with the Joneses rather than appreciating what you already have, and checking items off your to-do list rather than focusing on what matters most. As Sir William Wallace, the Scottish knight, said, “Every man dies. Not every man really lives.”
Parents give you life. Only you can give it meaning.
Do You Spend Time on Stupid Stuff?
Please leave a comment and tell us what you think or share it with someone who can benefit from the information.
Additional Reading:
Do You Compare Yourself to Others?
Don’t You Worry About a Thing
Make Time: There’s No Dress Rehearsal in Life
Your Job Doesn’t Define You
If You Can’t Be Yourself Around Others, Who Are You?
Moments Lost
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Cassandra Leong says
Everything you write here resonates deeply, Frank. Love it.
Especially LOVE your last two statements.
“Your parents give you life. Only you can give it meaning.”
Frank Sonnenberg says
Thanks Cassandra. I’m glad you like it 🙂
It doesn’t matter whether you’re rich or poor, powerful or weak, young or old — everyone has the same amount of time each day. What you do with that time is your choice and your choice alone. You can invest it or fritter it away. You can focus on priorities or waste it on meaningless tasks. The key is that every time you do something, you’ve chosen to forgo something else. So, the next time you say, “I don’t have the time,” what you’re really saying is, “I won’t make the time.”
Thanks for taking the time to write.
Best,
Frank