“I flunked the test.”
“We lost the game.”
“He turned me down.”
“I’m devastated. Simply devastated.”
When was the last time you experienced an event that made you feel as if the world was coming to an end for you? It seemed like a big deal at the time, but time has healing powers. In fact, time can also provide much-needed perspective. I’ll bet this wasn’t the first time the world came to an end for you. You may have received a lower grade than you expected, been cut from the team, broken up with your boyfriend or girlfriend, or made a complete fool of yourself in front of friends. . . . It probably felt like the weight of the world was on your shoulders. The question is, how do you feel about that incident today? It’s probably not even a blip on your radar screen.
I’m not saying these experiences aren’t important or that you overreacted at the time, but things often look different in retrospect. In fact, many of these “world-ending” events don’t even matter after five years. Chances are, knowing that would have saved you a lot of anxiety at the time. So what can we learn from this?
It’s not always the end of the world
It’s not personal. Unfortunate events are a part of life. Remember, failing at something doesn’t make you a failure.
Common sense. It’s easy to get caught up in the moment. Instead, take a deep breath and put your emotion on the back burner. It’ll give your brain a voice in the matter, too.
Know what matters. Not everything in life is equal; different situations require varying levels of emphasis and importance.
Perspective. There’s a difference between disappointment and a life-changing event. Ask yourself: Will this experience matter in five years?
Perfection. There’s nothing wrong with demanding perfection of yourself, but be a realist. Even on a perfect day, there may be clouds in the sky.
Remember . . . your phone will die; your car will get dented; your friend will disappoint you; you won’t win every business opportunity or receive every promotion. And, while it may seem like your world is coming to an end, life marches on. It always does. I’m not saying these matters are trivial or that life is always fair. But it’s important to keep things in perspective. One day you’re going to look back on these events and say it didn’t matter that much in the scheme of things. In fact, you may even say that it happened for a reason. If you had known that at the time, it would have made the situation a lot easier to swallow. Right? The truth is, it wasn’t really the day your world came to an end. In fact, it may have marked a whole new beginning for you.
What are your thoughts?
Additional Reading:
It’s Time to Have a Talk with Yourself!
Winging It Through Life
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Isn’t it amazing how things always seem to fall into perspective in hindsight. More and more I am learning what so many of the spiritual leaders throughout history have taught in one way or another, and that is to step back and become the objective observer of your own life. It makes for so much more peace and contentment.
I agree with you Steve. I wish I had learned this lesson earlier in life.
Have an awesome day!
Best,
Frank
Its funny how I can still remember silly little things like how mad I was 25 years ago when “the Dipper” bent my Darryl Strawberry rookie card by accidentally sitting on it. I can recall my overreaction and having to force an (at the time) insincere apology for my behavior, too.
Time has certainly provided new perspective on this. We remained close friends shortly after the spat that ensued but my friend passed away tragically young, shortly after college. When his parents were going through his belongings, they found an envelope with my nickname written on it and presented it to me. It was a small stack of baseball cards, mostly Mets – our shared team. On top was the another Darryl Strawberry rookie card in mint condition.
It seemed that he meant this for me but I’ll never know why he never gave it to me himself. The card today is hardly worth anything, just like most baseball cards some of us collected from this era, but back then it meant a lot and (to a 12yr old) was perceived to be worth a lot, too.
Today, although it’s retail value is meaningless, this card is as priceless to me as the lesson that remains: Life is too short to not talk to a friend for a week over a bent strawberry.
Hi Marc
That’s a very touching story. I’m sorry to hear about your friend. I can remember many, many times when my world came to an end. It’s easy for me to look back today and laugh, but it was no laughing matter at the time.
I think many of us go nuts over the craziest things. It’s SO important to keep things in perspective. I don’t think the world is ending any time soon.
Have an awesome day!
Best,
Frank
Great article on perspective. I feel this article really speaks to all of us especially the younger people. I have to say as a younger person I had this feeling a lot. As I grow older and gain a different perspective I have a better understanding.
Hi Tom
I’m glad you like the piece. Trust me … while you may think this lesson applies to younger people, I believe it applies to all of us. We all have problems. The key is to keep things in perspective.
Have a wonderful weekend!
Best,
Frank