25 Things to Know So That You Don’t Mess Up Your Kids

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As parents, we want the very best for our kids: to lead happy, healthy, and productive lives. We want our kids to live up to their potential, to grow up to be decent human beings, and to contribute back to society. But, although these goals are very admirable, getting across the finish line isn’t always easy. There are numerous ways to mess up your kids.

25 Ways to Mess Up Your Kids

Parents aren’t perfect — regardless of what some may say. Here are 25 things parents do to mess up their kids:

Undervalue education.
Make everything about money.
Rarely discipline.
Be unavailable.
Teach them to hate.
Belittle hard work.
Never say “no.”
Allow them to shrug off responsibility.
Fight their battles for them.
Buy their love.
Overlook bad behavior.
Make them dependent.
Tolerate mediocrity.
Push them too hard.
Fail to set limits.
Take your problems out on them.
Give them everything they want.
Place conditions on your love.
Allow them to disrespect others.
Strip them of their confidence.
Fail to impart good values.
Teach them to be selfish.
Make life too easy for them.
Serve as a poor role model.
Abandon parental responsibility.

Being a good parent isn’t for the faint of heart. It’ll test your wisdom, challenge your stamina, and defy your patience. But even though you’re not paid to be on your toes 24/7, it’s the most rewarding job in the world.

If you want your kids to be happy, successful, and well-adjusted adults, it requires your time, your dedication, and your love (with a touch of luck). Being a good parent is hard work. If you don’t make the effort to nurture your kids, don’t expect it to happen magically.

If you want your kids to possess strong moral character, it’s critical to live your life that way. While you can lecture them until you’re blue in the face, the best way to teach your children to be honorable is to lead by example. Period! If you want your kids to be confident, learn important life skills, and have a strong self-image, don’t overprotect them or make their life unrealistically easy.

If you want to give your kids the greatest gift of all, give them a good education, instill good values, inspire them, and set them free. Behind every good kid are parents or caregivers who understand the importance of raising them that way.

This is an excerpt from Listen to Your Conscience: That’s Why You Have One by Frank Sonnenberg.